supremegoddessofall: (Default)
I wore carefully selected jeans, although I rarely wear them. A tie-dyed top (but a blouse, not a T-shirt). Took the time to do my hair, even though it currently requires a half-gallon of gel and nearly as much hairspray since I direly need a haircut.

Tossed on a few pieces of funky jewelry (of course). Open-toed platforms (also of course) to show off my funky neon orange pedicure.

Finally, when I arrived, I carefully labeled my nametag with "current student/diva."

Maybe if they think I'm the diva they won't poke too deeply. Won't see the cracks, the flaws.

They're the applicants but I feel that it's I who must sell myself and our program rather than the other way around.

~~~~~

What a weird little world we all inhabit, here in our heads. Simultaneously both of-the-world and yet not, because we are each our own little worlds.

Tiny bubbles, dancing around each other, hoping that no one will break us. Hoping that we won't break ourselves. Won't show ourselves to be nothing but meaningless puddles, worthless in the great cosmic everything-nothingness.

~~~~~

So "diva" I was, at least for that night. And maybe (just maybe) that's how they saw me. Or maybe the saw the cracks.

If they did see my cracks, I hope they jump in.

There's so much more in the cracks to explore than there is on the surface.

~~~~~

This has been a post for LJ Idol. If you enjoyed it, I will post the voting information later in the week.

O.o

Feb. 11th, 2011 09:09 am
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
I just realized that I am 47 pounds away from my goal weight.

Whoa.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
Voting time again. If you liked my poem from earlier in the week, please vote for me. Top six advance to the main competition, bottom six get eliminated. Voting closes maybe Saturday? Dunno, he didn't say.

[Poll #1679092]
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
In the Morning                
     (when i wake….                
    
it is so early,                
     you know.)
there is a Dent,
an Impression –
a Reminder                
     (of you)
fragmented and fragile.

It is You but Not-You.
A semi-tangible Ghost,                
    
(you told me you will always haunt me,                
     in life or in death.                
     i believed you implicitly.)

gone but not forgotten.

It is not You and yet                
  
   (…and yet)
I hold your Pillow to my Breast,                
     (the heart inside beats for you,                
    
i own it no longer.)

a faux Lover.

I hold It and remember                
    
(…or pretend to forget                
     your absence)

your Softness
which I will not                
    
(cannot)
have again.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
If you liked my entry for LJ Idol this week, the polls are up. Top five enter the main competition, bottom five go home. Voting closes Saturday at 1 p.m.

[Poll #1675880]
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
I am not a crunchy person.

I mean, I *want* to be a crunchy person....
My chosen profession is crunch-filled
My politics are generally pretty crunchy.
(Except for that little part about being in favor of allowing the death penalty for the supremely un-crunchy, but we won't talk about that right now.)
My closest friends are supremely crunchy.

But I don't recycle because it's inconvenient,
I keep my heat set at 72 or 74 in the winter,
And I'm too damned cheap to buy organic.

It's a lot of work being crunchy.
It's a lot of work, and I'm lazy.

Nonetheless, I want to be crunchy.
I aspire to bring my outer self in line with my inner values.

So one of my New Year's Resolution (if I am indeed being resolute) is to be more crunchy.
I'm attending Nia class and trying not to laugh too hard when we're supposed to "fluff our core."
I'm trying not to tease my best friend for giving homeopathic medicine to her cat.
I've even signed up for some personal therapy - I start tomorrow.

I'm not crunchy yet, but I'm trying.
I'm not crunchy, but I aspire to crunchiness.

Maybe I won't hit Cheeto-level crunchy, but I can aim for being a rice cake.
A lower echelon of crunchability, let's say.

But fuck that organic shit - I'm still cheap.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
It's voting time for LJ Idol (2nd chance division). If you liked my poem on BDSM power dynamics, please think about giving me a vote. Top four will join the main competition and bottom four will be eliminated. Voting closes on Saturday at 3 p.m. EST

[Poll #1672572]
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
I walk a path you cannot follow.
Winding, circuitous.
(Dangerous, some might say.)
A tightrope hovering over jagged rocks.

But the lash empowers Me
(not cowers Me).
The bite, the sting -
these are all meant to be.

A trail you barely see -
you do not know and cannot understand.
Or perhaps will not understand.
A choice you make, as I make Mine.

I follow where you lead
but I shall not kneel.
I make others kneel before Me.
They kiss My feet and beg for more.

Which I give,
again and again,
secure in My sense of self,
reveling in the moans and sighs.

You cannot tread on My path,
and I cannot limit Myself to yours.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
It's voting time in 2nd chance idol. If you felt my post about a difficult choice was worth reading, I'd appreciate your vote. Voting closes Saturday at 3 p.m. EST. Similar as last week - top 3 enter the main competition, bottom 3 get eliminated.

[Poll #1669523]
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
It was irreversible before you got on the plane. I could not be there for the doing, but I couldn't not be there for the mourning.

You are the twin of my soul, the yin to my yang, and yet I cannot take this pain from you.

I would, you know - take the pain. I would swallow that bitter pill myself, were it only possible.

I cannot take the pain, but I can hold.

I can hold you so tightly the sobs wrack my own body instead of yours.

I can hold you so closely my womb reaches for yours.

I can hold you as the wanted-unwanted not-yet-life passes from you.

And I can hold you after.

Twin of my soul, I have no answers for you. Only these arms with which to support your weight when you cannot.

"I would have kept it, you know, if only..."

Twin of my soul, you owe me no explanations. My womb stands empty as does yours now. It aches, for your lost child and for the one it never had.

It's a Catch-22 with no winners. I heard that in your voice long before I saw it in your eyes.

"I keep wondering what my child would have looked like."

Twin of my soul, she would have been radiant, as radiant as the light that is no longer lives in your eyes.

I hope that light comes back. The world is not the same without your joy.

My world is not the same.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
So for some masochistic reason, when Gary offered a "second chance idol" for people to get back into LJ Idol, I decided that I didn't have *enough* to do with my time, so I'm writing for it. The way this works (this week anyway) is that the top 2 scorers get back into the competition and the bottom 2 are eliminated. So if you want to vote for me (if you liked my piece), please do so here.

[Poll #1667070]

Take Heart

Jan. 10th, 2011 09:26 pm
supremegoddessofall: (angry devil chick)
It's not easy being a heartless bitch.

I mean, I must *be* a heartless bitch, given what you whisper when you think I'm not looking.

Forgive me, but I fear you have mistaken the presence of reason for the absence of emotion. Apparently if I do not scream and shout and behave like a gibbering idiot, I have no feelings.

I have plenty of feelings, but I see no positive benefit to be gained in venting them all the time. I am perfectly capable of self-containment. I reflect on my emotions, rather than allowing them to reflect on me.

But, like I said, it's not easy being a heartless bitch. You see, the thing about us heartless bitches is that our relative lack of overt emotions gives us increased energy to pay attention to a lot of things you don't think we notice.

Perhaps it's lucky for you that I pretend not to notice anyway.

Perhaps it's lucky for you that being a heartless bitch requires me to pretend that it doesn't hurt when you call me one behind my back.

Or perhaps it's just lucky for me.

This has been an entry for [livejournal.com profile] therealljidol, Second Chance division. I'll probably post a voting link sometime later.
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
I'm a bitch, and I'm back.
supremegoddessofall: (hello zombie)
1) First and foremost, a reminder that I went to the most awesome high school ever. Dr. Miller has been reading "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" to students (and now former students' children) for more than 20 years. It's a tradition and we went several times when we were still in NC - bummed we missed it this year. His voice is sort of James Earl Jones-ish.





2) The 10 stages of narrowly avoiding a speeding ticket.

3) One guy, multiple tracks. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] whirled.



4) Dr. Who and Craig Ferguson goodness. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] rm.



5) Shortest real journal article in history. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] wordsofastory.

6) The Dead of Everest. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] amenquohi.

7) Bikini waxes for pre-pubescent children. This is disturbing to me in multiple ways. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] bart_calendar.

8) Assembling the Global Baby. Interesting thinky thoughts on reproductive choices. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] rm.

9) I agree with pretty much everything in this article. We need to fix the registry laws. Now. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] phoenixisrisen.

10) The Snake Fight portion of your thesis defense. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] rm.

11) This is an incredible video (available on Hulu, called America the Beautiful) about the culture of beauty in the United States. It's very long, so don't click unless you have some time to burn. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] parachles.



12) It's not a good idea to fry gnocchi. Really. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] xiphias.



13) This is kinda sad. Also I'm a geek because I got all of them. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] porcelain72.



14) You don't have to be Jewish to give. Or to laugh. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] fresh_tart.



15) BDSM and Foot Locker. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] felisdemens.



16) Lee and I have strange conversations sometimes.

17) If you hate "Christmas Shoes" like I hate "Christmas Shoes," you should listen to this. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] parachles.

supremegoddessofall: (Default)
This Is My Life, Rated
Life:
7.4
Mind:
8
Body:
6.8
Spirit:
8.3
Friends/Family:
6.3
Love:
7.3
Finance:
7.9
Take the Rate My Life Quiz
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
But at least I'll mostly put it behind a cut...

The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books listed here. Bold those books you've read in their entirety, italicize the ones you started but didn't finish or read an excerpt.

Read more... )

SCORE: 31/100 books read and 29/100 started or read excerpts. I should finish more books...
supremegoddessofall: (Default)
There are awesome. Some history teachers trying to make history fun. My favorites are The French Revolution, Black Death, Anne Boleyn, Ancient Minoan Civilization, Mary Queen of Scots, Cleopatra, Pompeii, The Vikings, Martin Luther, King Tut, Henry VIII, Joan of Arc, and Prehistoric.

http://www.youtube.com/user/historyteachers#p/u
supremegoddessofall: (suess)
Just got the following email from one of my students:

I just want you to know that at the beginning of this semester, I was not looking forward to this class. Dreading it would be a great word to describe what I was feeling for this class. Now that I am at the conclusion of the semester, I can honestly say that this has been one of my favorite classes. I learned a lot of great information, and I feel that you were a fantastic teacher. You made class interesting and really knew the material (unlike a lot of teachers). I really enjoyed participating in all of the projects you had us do as well. Love the fact you give many extra credit opportunities. This is not one of those classes that I just got through and will forget about now that I am done. I learned stuff in this class that I will carry with me throughout life. I feel priviliged to have had such a great teacher and to learn as much as I did. Thank you. I had fun this semester.

*glow*
supremegoddessofall: (sesame snark)
Yeah, overdo for one of these....

1) Awesome headline. Had tip to [livejournal.com profile] bart_calendar.



2) Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] bewize.



3) My favorite "It Gets Better" video to date. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] amenquohi.



4) "Can you help me get published?" Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] just_the_ash.



5) A very bored adult writes child-style letters to various famous people. And gets responses. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] amenquohi.

http://www.boingboing.net/2010/03/10/little-billys-letter.html

6) Mom writes an open letter to bigots. A lot of people probably saw this around Halloween.

7) As HIV babies come of age, problems linger.

8) Transgender athlete gets to play NCAA basketball.

9) Hand job? Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] apocalypticbob.



10) The most over-used line in cinema. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] rm.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/video/video_3529.html?1289575164

11) John Barrowman is validated. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] rowangolightly.



12) T-shirt war! Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] horosha.



13) This is how people get stabbed.



14) Poking fun at TSA. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] gmdreia.



15) Literal video for "Love is a Battlefield." Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] amenquohi.



16) Poking more fun at TSA.

17) What any sane person's reaction to The Giving Tree *should* be. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] xiphias.



18) Been a minute since I saw this, but I still love it. Hat tip to [livejournal.com profile] wordsofastory.



19) Happy Hannukah!

supremegoddessofall: (fast food zombies)
Reason #107 I love my surgery - weight 2 pounds less the day after Thanksgiving than I did the day before Thanksgiving.

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Kimberly Boyd-Bowman

May 2011

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